Is it even possible to keep any romance alive while sheltering in place and having everyone home full time? I would say ,”Yes” but you have to be creative and look at romance from a different perspective than you usually do. Here are some ideas for stay at home dates: You may not be able to go out to dinner, but you can still have a nice dinner at home together, take a bath together with candles and music, slow dance to your favorite tunes and share a bottle of wine, give each other massages. You get the idea, plan a date, the location might be at home, but the idea is to do something special together.
When I work with couples in counseling, I often hear each partner complain about how disconnected they feel from their spouse. This often has to do with how they communicate with each other, but it also tends to be a lack of romance or daily effort in staying connected to each other. It may seem a bit more challenging to do this when you are stuck at home because you are seeing each other a lot more and kids are around you a lot more. However, it is important to still pay attention to your spouse in a romantic way. Try to have alone time each day for at least 20 minutes. This can be to talk, snuggle, go for a walk, play a board game, etc… It should be something that is not related to the pandemic and not related to the busyness of running your household or work responsibilities. In other words, try to have fun together for at least 20 min a day. Having fun is very important for several reasons. For one, there is a lot of negativity in the news and in the world right now. Having fun makes us feel happy and more connected to our partners. It often reminds us of why we fell in love in the first place. Taking a break from all the serious matters at hand, is healthy for our mental health and reduces stress which is good for our immune system. And, don’t forget about sex! Most people feel happier and more connected when they are have physical intimacy in their marriage. Make time for sex, make time for fun and stay connected. Don’t let the pandemic ruin the reason you fell in love in the first place!
And, if you need help with communication or reconnecting, call me for an appt. I am offering video and phone sessions for individuals and couples.